Adventures in..Baby making!

So time passes,
We get house, better jobs and get married. 
Like many couples we think about the future, only with us, me pushing 30, and chance of early menopause that seamed very uncertain, but a bridge to cross when it came to it.
And it came to it.
In the spring of 2014 my hospital consultant told me, frankly if we wanted children we did not want to wait, as the grim madame of menopause was hanging over my shoulder.

                                               As we all know she takes the form of Pat Butcher

So we decided to try. 
Bringing me to the list of things people do when trying for a baby!

1. Sit upside down
2. Research on the internet
3. Get the apps
4. Attack like a predator when it is that "time"
5. Will tell ourselves we will never do the above!

And of course you will always run into people who tell you they just have to look at a penis to get pregnant.

                               Well done, congratulations! Do you want a prize? you got one a baby! 

In the grand-scheme of things we were lucky. It took less than a year and we didn't need any help, a few bumps but everything went fine. However after we had been trying for few months, I started getting the baby blues.

It was all I could think about. 

I had a spell of it a few years previously when a close friend fell pregnant, just as I got the diagnosis and the warning that I may not be able to have children. 

This broke me, however when we were trying I felt worse, as 11 friends all announced they were pregnant (most within the same month) this damn well killed me!

I felt wrong and cruel. I knew I should be happy for them but every time I was told, or saw the announcement I wanted to scream, cry, scream again, cry a lot.

                                      

                                                                   Congratulations I'm so happy for you! 

Worse was the friends trying to "comfort you" but telling you how parenthood ruined their lives and body, of course we know you trying to help but it was just a reminder of what we didn't have. 

It was a weird time being excited for our friends, but wanting to spit at the computer every time they showed a new ultrasound.

But it did happen for us, and for that I'm grateful.

And like many people will tell you, when we relaxed, took a break from trying, and got drunk (not recommended by doctors!) that's when it happened.

So my advise for those trying, based on my experience

• Take regular breaks from the apps, plans and hopes. The more pressure you put on yourself is more stress for your body. Have a chilled fun month!
• Take care of yourself step back and take a mental break from it, have a night out, pamper yourself, go on a mini adventure or watch Idris Elba films.
• Take care of your relationship yours a couple wanting a baby not machines!
• Take care of both your bodies if you both want this, you both need to make changes! There's no point you cutting out caffeine and other vices, if he's drinking every night. Your lifestyle effects your swimmers!
•  Its OK to ask for help go to your doctors, even if its not for treatment they can recommend changes you can make to help prepare your body. And if its been a year they can help.

and when your low just think of Idris...

..I mean think of your partner! of course! ...um...